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14-Nov-2017 18:53

Do I continue to feel attracted to the "safety" of men who are unavailable? I still find talking on the phone alluring, and my most recent relationship, which lasted three years, was long-distance.I think I'll always be evolving in that department. "Ever since my father died, I've been terrified to get too close to anyone..." The e-mail was long and apologetic, full of searing self-criticism and shamefaced confessions.The mere sound of Jamie's voice made my heart thump wildly. He said he'd like nothing more than to meet me but admitted he still felt scared. "You might not be attracted to me." In hindsight, I should have cut and run right then.He told Business Insider, “Guys send girls money whether it’s for content or simply to be a nice, generous guy. We’ve heard of them helping pay for things from tuition to speeding tickets.” With about 8,200 women and 15,000 new men who sign up each month, they buy credits for a dollar each to exchange on the site.

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Being treated as my father's intellectual and emotional equal was heady stuff, and I'm guessing it was then that I developed a taste for the whispered intimacy of a forbidden nighttime chat.But I didn't date anyone else during that period—at least not seriously. Patty was one of the few people who knew the full extent of our connection. She took the phone and talked to him for five minutes, laughing at his jokes. The guy I'd told everything to, with whom I'd entrusted my deepest feelings, had tossed me aside for another faceless romance — with one of my best friends, no less. But in the midst of my anger and confusion came clarity: My relationship with Jamie wasn't real; it never had been.

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